Okay, I am going to vent so if you do not want to read about husband bashing click off - now.
Did that get your attention I hope so.
I am so tired of going to ladies functions and after all the uplifting of the night having it dashed to the floor at the dessert table by someone trashing their husband. I am tired of standing in line at a store to hear the witchy woman in front of me on her cellphone telling the unknown caller what a dirtbag she is married to. I am frankly tired of reading on other peoples blogs the blatant disrespect for their spouse - the person that they chose to marry.
I do not have the perfect spouse! I am sure that there is not one man out there that does everything right, but in moments of tenderness The Man is the best ever out there for me. He has endured awful pregnancies where I blamed him for my condition, he has dragged me out of state away from my family kicking and screaming, he has provided many beautiful homes to live in and then proceeded to make them more beautiful because I did not like the carpet, paint, flooring, etc... Each and every day he gets up and goes to a job that he does not love but he does it because he loves me and wants me to be happy and well taken care of. Does he still do things that make me want to lash out with some clipping comment -you bet!
When I was a young bride I heard a great lesson that I gratefully committed to memory about our relationship with our spouse. We as the wife are very powerful in either helping or hurting our husbands. They respond to life by how we are treating them. If they are well loved and taken care of and feel that we desire them above everything else they will gladly go out and slay the dragon for us each and every day. But, if we tear them down, belittle all that they do, criticize, categorize and compare, how devoted are they going to be to us?
I have chosen to make sure that my complaints with my husband are between he and I. I do not chose to air my complaints in public, especially at social functions where my spouse is in attendance. I will never forget being in a circle of women each taking moments to comment on their husband and seeing over this one woman's shoulder, her husband; his face as he heard what she had to say about him when she though he was out of ear shot. The pain he felt was apparent on his face and we all felt shamed to have been party to this public flogging of what I thought was a good man. I realized that then and there I never, ever wanted to be the person to put that look onto my husbands face.
I love my husband, he puts up with so much from me. I worry him, I delight him, and I hope that at the end of the day he also knows without a doubt that I love him. We have spent 13 years together and it seems so not long enough for me to completely know him. I support him, I desire success for him and I hope that he is proud of what we have done together as a couple and as a family.
So in the end of all this I am reminding myself that what I choose to let come out of my mouth about those that I love affects my happiness too. I need to choose those words wisely no matter where I am........